Has there ever been something going on within your life in which you say over and over to yourself, and sometimes even complain out loud to others, ‘Why Me? What did I do to deserve this?’
Has there ever been an obstacle put in your path, and you just fell to the floor distraught, not knowing what to do about it? Has there ever been anything that happened that you thought you would never ever get through?
Did you eventually get through it? How did you do it? Are you still stuck inside of something and don’t know how to get out?
I know that I personally have had my fair share of troubles, blocks, and train wrecks thrown at me. At the time during which these things had their place in my life, my outlook on things was entirely different, however, they shaped the person that I am today and I would not be where I am right now without them. I truly believe that weakness can make you stronger. When you really feel like you are dry of hope, when you fall to the ground in anguish, when your heart hurts and you can’t take it anymore, that is the moment in which you can rise up and become strong.
During my younger years, up until I was 30, I felt like I had trouble after trouble haunting me. I felt as if I must have done something awfully wrong in a past life to get me to this point, because no matter where I turned, something sprouted up to block my way. Something always seemed to be there, waiting for me to have a moment of calm in my life, just so it could disrupt that feeling. I felt as if I must be the most unlucky person in the world. If the straws were to be picked, I always got the short one. Little did I know, that those things were shaping me into the strong woman that I am today. Little did I know that by getting through those things, it has led me here. Little did I know that I would die at the age of 30 and be re-born into someone completely new.
"Die? How did you die, you are still here?" Many of you may be questioning.
I did not die a physical death, but a death of the old me. Funny, because all while I was growing up, I really did fear turning the age of 30, as I thought I would die before that day arrived. How true it was indeed! My old self died, and the new me emerged into life.
I began to see that I was responsible for absolutely everything in my life that I had been thrown. Absolutely everything! I had no reason to ask why me, I had no reason to blame others any longer. I was not the victim, except of my own thoughts. My thoughts had victimized me, and yet, I was responsible for being the victim. No longer would I allow that to enter into my frame of reference. No longer would I ever see others the same way. No longer would I allow myself to fall into the trap of self-pity. Many people do not understand the thought process here. They ask, "How can you be to blame for (insert thing here)?" Well, the truth of the matter is, I have created this life of mine. I have the free will to be, do, and act as I choose. If I choose to be the victim, then I am creating a story for myself that I do not like. If I choose to be free from victimization, then I am creating for myself a great novel! By taking the responsibility of all things that occur in my life, I know that I can change them to be any way that I wish for them to be!
When things come my way, I can go back to those times in which I was the weakest, and draw upon my own strength, the strength that the Holy Spirit has instilled into my life. When I am walking hand in hand with the Holy Spirit, I am being guided with peace, with love, and with life.
Blessings and Light,
Leslie
Copyright 2008 Leslie Smith All rights reserved. http://soulsolutionshealing.com/lesliesmith.html
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